Signs

 Signs.  Do people really need all of them out there?  Who makes certain signs or more importantly - who places such signs in such locations?!?!

  I recently saw a sign at the beach attached to a ramp that said "Slippery when icy".  Who thought that it was necessary to warn people of something that will not happen in a city that never has temperatures below freezing?  Did that person think that maybe those that pass by will learn that ramps can be slippery and then when they are in relevant areas (aka cold climates) they will think back to the little sign at the beach that warned them of icy dangers on ramps?!? ....I think not!  Also may I suggest to the mindless idiot who put that sign there - why not have a more appropriate sign such as "slippery when wet"?  Also a friend of mine that worked in construction had to put up a sign that said "Construction - Please use other foot path" in front of a shallow hole, despite also putting up big plastic fence barriers and reflective tape.  The obvious reason for the sign (i assume) was so that the company could not be sued if an individual was to, lets say - climb the fence, jump over the barriers, fall into the hole and hurt themselves. 

Are humans really so dense that they need everything spoon fed to them?!  When will we start using more than 10% of our amazing brains?  No wonder!  Perhaps foot paths should have signs saying "for walking" on them just to clarify things for people.  Maybe the beach should have a sign saying "CAUTION! Wet substance present!".  For f*cks sake, a Maccas coffee tells you that its hot and to be careful.  The person that obviously sued McDonalds for spilling their hot coffee on themselves was very cleaver but if they didnt realise that coffee is hot (which im sure they did) then they should seriously not exist with such lack of intelligence.  The natural world works so that the weak do not survive.  Will we all become like this one day?  Clearly not.  I am merly being very dramatic but it does concern me slightly that people pay money to put up ridiculous signs.

Now that my rant is over please laugh and do not take anything I said seriously (but do if you are one of the idiots that works for the government and puts up dumb ass signs because clearly you have very little intelligence)!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

This is more like it....

 

Detox Day

I'm rather thankful that Christmas is finally over.  I've done all my "post christmas sales" shopping and ended up with clothes, a fridge and various other bits and pieces.  Today was mind and body detox day.  I should have probably waited until after new years but this year I'm not planning on drinking more than a glass of wine or two.

Detox day essentials (in my eyes):

• Sleep - Sleep in so that your body feels completely rested (get your 8 hours +).
  

• Breaky- Eat anything energy boosting (eggs, baked beans, whole grain cereal, Bananas, lupin bread or rye toast) + tea or hot water with lemon.  Today I had 2 oat bricks (like weetbix but with oats) with low fat soy milk and a cup of green tea.
  
  
• Exercise - I did 60-120 minute gym session with cardio and 15 minute circuit.  My brain always needs exercising too to feel good (weird right?) so I like to take something somewhat educational to read at the gym.
  
  
•  Relaxation -  10 minutes steam room followed by shower and then 15 minutes aromatherapy or a massage (if you have $$$) and shower.
  

•  Lunch - Fresh, energy boosting, lots of protein.  I had mini falafal pieces, hommus and salad wrapped in mountain bread + berries and more tea.
  
  
• Nature - Read outside, lounge in the sun in a chair for a while, beach, walk.
  
  
• Grooming - Bath with epsom salts (those things are SO amazing), lavender essential oil burning, loofah, pumice stone, body scrub (I LOVE anything made by "Say yes to carrots" - Body scrub, cleanser, hair mud mask and moisturiser).

• Dinner - Smallest meal packed with veggies and grains (carbs) and our lovely friend protein.  I think I'm going to make a veggie curry with mixed bean and cous cous salad.  As mentioned before do the 1/4, 1/4, 1/2 rule.

Other detox "helpers"

LEMON
lemon is also the only food in the world that carries a negative molecular charge, making it “anionic,” just like the digestive enzymes in our bodies (such as hydrochloric acid). Surprisingly, other citrus fruits aren’t anionic—only fresh lemon.  Lemon’s negative ionic charge, combined with its strongly alkalizing effects, makes it a terrific detoxifier. Dr. Carey A. Reams, in his Biological Theory of Ionization, says that, “All the foods we eat are cationic with the exception of lemon … when it goes into the system it can be converted into some 6 billion different enzymes with less chemical change than any other natural substance known to man.”

Lemon also helps to produce the bile necessary to properly digest food and assimilate nutrients, so it rebuilds the liver.  It is important to remember that the juice must be consumed fresh; The Tao of Detox recommends drinking it mixed with water on an empty stomach!
(www.care2.com/)


BATHS
Baths are wonderfully healing. Hot water draws toxins out of the body to the skin’s surface, and while the water cools it pulls toxins from the skin, according to Naturopath Dr. Hazel Parcells. Epsom salts augment this detoxification by causing you to sweat. Other salts—all highly alkaline and cleansing—used in baths include sea salt, baking soda, clay, and Dead Sea salts. Caution: Do not take hot baths and salt baths (including Epsom salt baths) if you have heart trouble, high blood pressure, or are diabetic.
 
Basic Salt Soak Bath Formula: Minerals and salts make the bath water feel silky and leave your skin cleansed and soft. 1 cup sea salts 2 cups baking soda 1 cup Epsom salts 1 to 2 tablespoons glycerin per bath Combine the sea salts, baking soda, and Epsom salts in a bowl. Stir to blend. Pour 1/4 cup or so into the bath while the tub is filling. Add 1 to 2 tablespoons glycerin to keep your skin from drying out (more for dry skin, less for oily skin) and essential oils of choice.
(www.care2.com/)


TEA
According to Dr. Rudolph Breuss, this tea is the single most effective herbal tea for detoxifying the body and strengthening immunity and resistance on a daily basis.

INGREDIENTS
2 cups water
1 teaspoon dried sage
1/2 teaspoon dried St. John’s Wort
1/2 teaspoon peppermint
1. Bring water to a boil in a non-aluminum pot. Lower the heat and add the sage, allowing mixture to simmer for exactly 3 minutes, then remove pan from heat.
2. Add the St. John’s Wort and peppermint, cover with a lid, and let steep exactly 10 minutes. Strain tea into a thermos or bottle, discarding the dregs.
3. Drink about 1/2 cup, 3 to 4 times daily, on an empty stomach.

Adapted from The Tao of Detox, by Daniel Reid (Inner Traditions, 2006).

Real women eat more than three bites and real men love curvey women.

With Christmas approaching I have noticed a dramatic increase in weight loss remedies and bullshit diets to help girls get through the Christmas season, especially in magazines.  Take Victoria Beckham for example.  Vicks is following the "three bite" diet this Christmas.  Basically you choose the few things that you want to eat and you have three small bites of each.  I'm rather impressed to hear that shes eating and also very amazed at her control but she is possibly one of the most unhealthy celebrities out there!! She wears smaller sized clothing that her kids!  I know that many of these articles are comprised of total bullshit facts because as I've said before, journalism is nasty but still - why give girls these ideas in the first place and who comes up with this shit?

The female body has experienced many challenges over the years.  Many of you would have been merly energy somewhere in the universe when women were loved for their giant curves and fertile figures.  It is only a relatively recent thing to love really skinny women but whats the fun in a bag of bones.  Is it really beautiful.  Fair enough for those naturally thin girls out there but for all of you "wanna bees" just focus on being HEALTHY.  There are some (like me) who will always be pear shaped no matter how hard they try and will only get worn out trying to be rake thin!

Moving on... 

As you will know by now nutrition is my passion.  I never want to be a nutritionist that has to work with psychologically damaged teenage girls who can't see that they are absolutely killing their bodies.  I rather work with athletes or children or men going through a mid life crisis that need help getting back to a healthy weight.  This isnt to say that I hold anything against girls that don't eat to look and feel good but girls - chances are you already look amazing but don't eat it if you're going to kick yourself in the head I guess.

I'd love to share with you some obvious facts about diets and being thin - most of which you will know I'm sure but just a reminder that food is NOT bad but it can be bad.

Christmas eating Rules 

1. EAT. Do not deprive yourself or it will have an emotional and physical impact.

2. DO NOT eat too much or you will just get depressed about it.

3. Steer away from saturated fats.  I know that I will not be personally tucking into a turkey or ham this chistmas but if you are make sure you follow the 1/4 meat rule and grab lots of other stuff to fill you up.

4. Go easy on alcohol. 

5. Remember its christmas and christmas dieting is stupid!  Diets dont work its all about controling portions and regular exercise. 

Myths

- No food = skinny and beautiful.
WRONG = unhealthy and drained!
Slows your metabolism and drains your body of energy.  When your body runs out of fat to burn, muscle tissue will be broken down as a fuel source.  Your gut remains healthy if you "eat and excrete".  A SUPER healthy person will poo twice a day :) Your body tells you when its hungry so EAT!

- Fats are bad

Your body NEEDS fats but the right kind for repair and for healthy skin, nails, hair and eyes.

- "Fat blaster" pills make you thin

Pills that "flush fat out" are absolutely bullshit.  Even if they improve fat loss for a while you are not going to take them your whole life!!! Your body won't be as efficient without them once you've used them so why do it?  Have control and be sensible.  One piece of christmas cake will not give a female a muffin top.

Beautiful body =

Leather Ladies

I love working in a chemist.  I've already learnt things that will be very valuable to me.  I have also observed a lot of strange creatures such as teenagers, old people and pretty much everyone to be honest.  Teenagers are the best - whether they are buying condoms or pregnancy tests they always attract attention and have humerous conversations with me.  I am also amazed at how many attractive people come in looking for herpes medication but this is breaking confidentiality barriers so I shall tell you about a kind that I have seen a lot recently.  They come when the sun is out past 30 degrees and shall be known as "leather ladies". 

How to spot a leather lady:

- Leather ladies are ALWAYS tanned a shade of brown that is much like a leather couch.

- They are usually 40+ but often look about 5-10 years older than they should due to extreme sun exposure over  the years.

- They will not go into a chemist without buying baby oil.

- They will not go to the beach without applying half the bottle of that baby oil and will have a cupboard full of emergency back up supply.

- Leather ladies have very prominant wrinkles.

- Their heels are often dry.

I'm sure you will see many leather ladies this summer and although you may argue that I have labelled and completely judged this individuals I will admit that I have, however the only thing wrong with them is that they are addicted to the sun and dislike the thought of sunscreen.  In a nut shell WEAR SUNSCREEN and NOT BABY OIL and you shall age beautifully :)

Dreams of 2009

DREAMS
Hold fast to dreams,
For if dreams die,
Life is a broken-winged bird
That cannot fly.

They say that you have the power to become whatever it is you want to become and to achieve whatever it is that you want to achieve.  They also say that life is 10% what happens and 90% how you perceive life's happenings.  I myself have come to believe that you attract what you want by wanting it so much and by putting in the work in order to get the goods in a neat little box at the end.  I've come across some dreamers that continue to dream instead of attracting a new reality and so I say to you:

- Once you hit 21 life does not go down hill, life begins.
- Anything is possible if you dare to try.
- Life is beautiful even though sometimes it may be masked by bad things...but dig up the good things that  hide beyond the sand.
- Love yourself NOW because later is TOO LATE!

This year I have discovered that I am more independent than I think I am.  I have been more in touch with my dreams and I have achieved every single one that I have had.

I have travelled the world

 

 

I have been surrounded by good company

 

I have discovered my passion and future career path

 

 

I have found the perfect part time job

 

 

I have watched my brother marry

 

 

I have been in touch with my inner self; me - a free spirit

Dare to dream but dare even more to achieve.

Buy me a muscle car!

I'm told that usually girls are rarely associated with cars unless they are spread out naked across the bonnet but I guess I'm a little different.  Its not so odd for a female to love shows like Top Gear and Fifth Gear (who could resist James May, Richard Hammond and Jeremy Clarkson) but to watch it for the cars apparently is.  I asked a friend once what car she had and my reply was "a yellow one".  This was not the answer I was looking for.  Another time I changed the car tire of a stranded BMW driving uni student.  Sure cars wreck the environment and are mearly machines but they have character, they have sentimental value and they are powerful beasts waiting to be driven by either your average Joe or motor enthusiast. 

Personally I love my muscle cars.  Rice burners just dont cut it for me.  Sure if I had the skills to race something powerful I'd choose something Japanese but my dream vehicle would definintely be a 1967 Ford Mustang Shelby GT 500.  Driving one of those would make my heart beat a million miles a minute and make my palms sweaty.  I'd do anything just to be able to drive as fast as I can in a powerful beast; listening to her roar and being filled with adrenoline.  Dreams will be dreams but one day perhaps...

Tonight I watched "Love the Beast", a documentary about Eric Bana's dream machine, the absolute love of his life - an old Ford Falcon Coupe.  I must say that I was a little disappointed with the documentary as I was hoping it explored more than just the one car but it was simply about his obsession with this one beautiful beast.  Its kind of funny how humans can love something so much that they completely personalise it and it becomes part of them and their identity.  Sadly I did get over it a bit and watched Bana more than the car.

Anyhoo if you've read this blog entry to here - WELL DONE.  I shall conclude by sharing a few of my most favourite cars:

1967 Ford Mustang Shelby GT 500: My ULTIMATE dream

1987 Porsche Carrera 911: Love porches, old or new.

Aston Martin

Audi RS4
VW Golf
Pontiac Firebird
Corvette
Dodge Viper
Mini/Moris minor
Oh there are millions.

The essence of woman...

I have an obsession with the human body but in particular the female form.  Throughout history the female body has been a sign of fertility, beauty, sexuality and nurturing.  However the birth of Catholicism caused females to become more oppressed, less powerful and regarded as tempters of evil (take the story of eve and the snake in the garden of eden for example).  Prior to this, females were seen as powerful and very sacred figures. 

Anyhoo....just thought I'd share with you one of the most beautiful of women in my eyes. 

Curves, intelligence and poise.  Possibly a little bit skinny for my liking but all in all Dita Von Teese is a GODESS =]

 

 

Meat wars

I'm not a crazy vegan lady that goes around dissing my carniverous friends but (as mentioned in previous blogs) my passion for nutrition sends me on serious rants at times.  Lets see...where to begin?  I am no meat eater but I do not like to label myself with the term "vegetarian".  I eat a vegetarian diet and do not enjoy the taste of meat but will often eat seafood, mainly salmon for its omega 3 fatty acids and for protein when I need a brain and body boost.  I eat lots of soy products, do not eat dairy/drink milk but will have cheese on occassions.  I'm not strict about what I eat, I just like being healthy.  So why eat like this you may ask.  Although there are many ethical reasons behind having such a diet I am not really in it for that so much.  Yes I hate the idea of slaughtering animals but its more the health and environmental aspects of eating meat that I dislike - not to mention the taste of steak.  Meat eaters - go a month without a steak and then have one and see how horrible it really tastes...otherwise could just be me.  It is fair to say though that vegetarian diets need a lot of structure otherwise the health benefits are not met.  Eating pasta all day will get you nowhere but soy products (particularly femented soy such as tofu and soy sauce), vegetables, grains, fruits and legumes etc will definitely benefit your health.  Dairy has not been designed for our bodies.  Who thought of drinking a cow's milk anyway?  Weirdos.  Humans are all slightly intolerant to the proteins in milk and also the sugar lactose, yet most people are able to successfully digest dairy.  I sadly, am not.  Anyhoo - the ranting begins...


So here are just some facts about why eating meat is not on my daily agenda:

- The American Dietetic Association states that vegetarians have “lower rates of death from ischemic heart disease; … lower blood cholesterol levels, lower blood pressure, and lower rates of hypertension, type 2 diabetes, and prostate and colon cancer” and that vegetarians are less likely than meat-eaters to be obese.

- Studies also show that cows play significant roles in deforestation, soil erosion, water scarcity, global warming, depletion of fossil fuels, and loss of biodiversity (odd as it may sound, the environmental impact of the cow is perhaps even more calamitous than the automobile).

- Vegetarians and vegans live, on average, six to 10 years longer than meat-eaters.

- While the suffering of all animals on factory farms is similar, each type of farmed animal faces different types of cruelty.  Many are given hormones to produce milk or to grow at a faster rate than their organs can handle, they are kept in crowded conditions and are bread to lead poor quality lives.

- All other meat eaters eat RAW meat.  The human body can not handle raw red meat.

- The human body is not designed to eat meat like we do!!  We have longer digestive tracts (because we are not meant to expel our food as fast as meat eaters), no claws, large molars for grinding but reduced incisors and canines.  Meat rots in our digestive tract because our stomach acid is not acidic enough to digest it properly before it gets to our intestines.

So many more reasons but look at:

http://www.meatjunkie.com/ and watch "eat to save your life" by Jamie Oliver.  There are millions of other sources out there but these were memorable to me :)

Breathe in now...

Do you ever have moments where you sit back and feel so lucky to be who you are and have what you have?  If not then you should.  It might be hard but its possible for anyone, the human mind is so incredibly powerful and we don't even realise it.  Try to see life like the beautiful roses on a thorn bush, instead of the terrible thorns on a rose bush.  It is so rewarding.  Most of you don't need me to promote "life" to you because hopefully you see beauty in it already.  For those who struggle to see it, when you wake up tomorrow and you look out your window embrace whats out there and know that what you see is the smallest view of an entire world and your possibilities are endless.

Heres a favourite quote of mine that always seems to sum up life for me, in a nut shell of course:

"It's hard to stay mad, when there's so much beauty in the world. Sometimes I feel like I'm seeing it all at once, and it's too much, my heart fills up like a balloon that's about to burst... And then I remember to relax, and stop trying to hold on to it, and then it flows through me like rain and I can't feel anything but gratitude for every single moment of my stupid little life..."

American Beauty

And others that I love:

"Be happy, be healthy and embrace life.  Its too short to live any other way".

"As we cultivate peace and happiness in ourselves, we also nourish peace and happiness in those we love".

"Be thankful for what you have; you'll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you don't have, you will never, ever have enough".

"Your living is determined not so much by what life brings to you as by the attitude you bring to life; not so much by what happens to you as by the way your mind looks at what happens".

Blog 1

So I created this blog about 6 months or more ago and have still never actually made a post.  I've had many blogs in the past, mainly because of my former dreams to become a wealthy successful journalist until I realised that

1. freshman journalists are poor for a looooong time until they have a big break which may never happen.

2. I want to change, help and inspire people and what I write may change someone but i'll never really know.

3. Writing is a way of expressing myself and I don't enjoy formatting my passionate rants to suit particular audiences.

4. The media = somewhat evil and deceptive at times.

As under age teenage drinkers are seeking sexual partners, eating Mi goreng and trying so desperately to get fucked up off goon, I've spent a lot of time reminiscing about past times that seemed fun at the time but will always be remembered for their "uniqueness"....and possibly also for their awfulness.  Eating chicken kickers out of a girl's mouth, watching your friend squat to take a piss and get a stick in her ass, burning someone with a cigarette, tripping over your drunk friend who passed out behind a log one camping trip, when it was cool to meet private school kids at Claremont HJs, spending endless days in a park with a fucking special boy, tucking my dress into my underwear and standing at a bus stop, and when you try to piss out a caravan window.  These are some among the many I was giggling to myself about and no matter how terrible they were at the time its great having them to remember.  I'm hoping that tonight there are many many people out there making complete asses of themselves so that they can also look back and lol :)

I dont have much to say but thought i'd at least make a post.

Once I troll old PC there will be much better images here :)

Memorable quotes:

"Twisties- cheesy msg goodness"

"And we shall have a pet cat thats black with a white spot....and called 'dandruff'"
"You can't get sunburnt when its over cast because the clouds don't let the rays through"
"Mikes morgue - You kill em, we chill em"
"Its because I'm so fucking ladsy"
"Nigger PLOX"

"Love you pretttttty"

"Kekekekekekeke gogogogogoggogogoggo"

"You're burning me with your cigarette and it looks like its hurting me..oi...bitch...oi...OI MIRANDA"

"I'll bash you"

"Yeah my whole family works at chicken treat....except for my sister"

"You'll shit for a week"
"Eat the food dick"
"Its probably the coolest thing i've ever done"
" I have a stick in my fucking ass"
"Yeh from behind he looks like a 30 year old guy dating a 15 year old.... you may have to grow"

"Stove top head"

"keeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeewl"

"at the saaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaame time"
"Didi Mao"